I thought Mildly Informative went out of business!

Most of you have probably gotten over the shock of not receiving your Mildly Informative IV Drip for some time now. If you haven’t, I know a mediocre therapist who won’t solve your any of your issues, but will sympathetically hand you tissues while ignoring you pour out your heart.

Two forces have conspired to prevent my heretofore semi-regular dissemination. The first was a full-time programming job I accepted at the beginning of 2010. As this was my first W-2 job since 1984, you can imagine what a massive fail this was. It underscored poor financial decisions, but worse it exposed my severe lack of skills in starting a venture which I had hoped would be wildly successful and lucrative, but is instead mildly monetarily successful at best, even if it does provide an amazing quality of life.

The second force causing my lack of communication is that I’m male. Ha ha, just kidding. It’s Facebook. I could probably tell you all the reasons Facebook obsoletes predecessors, but my guess is that you’re more savvy with the platform (I’ve never poked anyone) and would come up with several reasons that I overlooked.

When I began my search for a full time position (I still cringe at those 3 words), Fitpacking was languishing and I thought I’d have to close up shop. I also found that my web programming skill set was dated, so I learned ASP (I’m not nearly the disciple of Microsoft that corporations seem to be), using the Fitpacking web site on which to learn it.

By the time the hideously ugly Fitpacking site was completely transformed into its now moderately ugly state, I was working full time. Unexpectedly however, the overhauled site starting bringing in new business. By the time summer rolled around, I was far too busy running trips to keep the job, so I quit. Note: “Yay!”, is the proper response here, unless you inexplicably want to be in some kind of stable relationship with me.

I met some amazing people last season and visited Redwood National Park, Yosemite, Crater Lake, Shenandoah, Mt. Rainier, Canyonlands, and the White Mountains. However, when the season ended in October it was back to work.

This time however I accepted a contract with Abt associates in Cambridge. I worked on and deployed (great resume word) TRI.Net for the EPA … a program that monitors toxics dumped into the environment. Finally, computer work I could feel good about. In fact, you can download and use the program yourself if you’d like to monitor toxics in your area (or your co-worker’s cubicle) http://www.epa.gov/tri/tridotnet/index.html .

In December, my Aunt Diana Zimmerman passed away. She was the last remaining member of my father’s family, or at least in that generation. So it was sad not only to lose her, but to think of my father, who died just over 20 years ago now. Not only did I just start thinking about my father again and reflect for quite some time … after writing that, it makes it really hard to segue into anything else.

Anyway, back to self-serving detritus. The March issue of Backpacker Magazine contained a feature article about Fatpacking. I could try to hype it, but I’m not as attached to you reading it as I used to be when I was a lot more insecure. http://www.fitpacking.com/BackpackerArticle.pdf . It was actually pretty good exposure and I want to thank the writer Jim Gorman for making Fatpacking somehow seem like a desirable outfitter.

I’m not going to drag you through all the other dumb media exposure Fitpacking has been fortunate enough to generate, but two cool ones are Money Magazine and CNN / Money.
http://money.cnn.com/2010/05/27/pf/computer_hiking.moneymag/index.htm
http://money.cnn.com/video/pf/2010/05/28/pf_sa_fit_packing.moneymag/

Oh, and lest I forget to mention Barf Bags, last fall I went to New York City and was interviewed by Adam West (you might know him as “Adam West” on Family Guy, or possibly as Batman) regarding the Air Sickness Bag collection. It’s for a pilot he wants the network to pick up. It was fun, absurd, cool, surreal and educational (?) all at the same time.

So many other amazing things have happened to so many other amazing people I know but I don’t know what they are. So at the risk of this tome becoming moderately informative, I’ll stop here.

Steve

Mildly Informative is Back and it's Less NutritiousThan Ever!

It's been almost a year since I've sent out a Steve's Mildly Informative Stuff. Instead of regaling you with harrowing, inspirational tales that bring you warmth and laughter, I figured I'd use this forum as a cheap way to beat you down with a self-serving advertisement.

I'm asking you to please pass this link on to your social network, mentioning the Fitpacking 3 Day Sale where trips are up to $150 off: http://bit.ly/eHMK6P

Next newsletter, I'll return to the usual pabulum you've become accustomed to and rightly demand from me, to help you feel better about how your life is going.

Thanks,
Steve

3 Day Sale - $150/$100 off any 2011 Fitpacking trip!

Take $150 off any 2 week Fitpacking trip or $100 off any 1 week Fitpacking trip in 2011, by booking your trip and paying in full between Friday, Dec 3 – Sunday, Dec 5, 2010.

1. Sign up for a trip: http://bit.ly/eHMK6P
2. Enter Promotion Code: BORDER4COLLIE
3. Pay for trip in full. If you cannot find your trip in the shopping cart, just place a deposit. Your credit card will be charged the entire amount less the discount.
4. Credit Cards: you will be charged the correct amount.
5. PayPal: you will be refunded the discount.

Limit 1 discount per person
You can use this discount in addition to your Frequent Hiker discount.
The cancellation policy remains the same, but if you cancel your trip, you will not be able to take advantage of the discount on another trip.
Offer good from 12:01 AM EST, Dec 3, 2010 – 11:59 PM PST, Dec 5, 2010.

Lauren Dunn Cancer Benefit

Lauren Dunn of Hull is a charming and gregarious 6 year old who was stricken with a rare form of cancer earlier this year. While there are certainly many physical and emotional issues for her and her family to deal with, there are also financial hardships, especially in the current down cycle.

On Sunday, November 29, 2009, a benefit for Lauren is being held in Dorchester, MA from 2-7PM. It’s going to be held at Florian Hall on 55 Hallet St and will feature Live Entertainment, Refreshment, Raffles, and a Silent Auction.

For a $20 donation, this is a great opportunity to directly help the quality of life of a child who could really use it. Check out the photo of her on the front page of the Boston Globe: http://www.fitpacking.com/Lauren/ and a link to the accompanying article.

Just so you know, I will be attending the benefit ……….. so that I can tell you all about the upcoming Fitpacking trip to the Florida National Scenic Trail / Ocala National Forest, January 16-24, 2010. You might consider joining us since this is a GREAT time to get away from the freezing winter weather especially to go hiking and get in shape. http://www.fitpacking.com/2010/FT.aspx

Good news from my mother, Noa Miller. In this month’s elections, she was just re-elected to the Water Pollution Control Authority board for the town of Middlebury, CT. She is also a member of the Middlebury Commission on Aging. If you live in the area, you should stop by the swearing in ceremony at Shepardson Community Center on Monday, December 7, 2009 @7:00PM ……………. so that SHE can tell you all about the upcoming Fitpacking trip…

Speaking of Fitpacking, we were recently featured in the Howard County Times of Maryland. The article can be found here: http://www.explorehoward.com/events-entertainment/67207/great-fall/ and in this article, you don’t have to scroll all the way down to the bottom to receive gratification (if reading about Fitpacking can be considered any kind of gratification.)

Fitpacking guides, Todd “Big Ovaries” Soprych and Rosie Enos have started a backpacking venture targeted to women called Roam the Woods, http://www.roamthewoods.com/ because like me, they failed Economics.

And finally, instead of leaving you with some thought provoking, opinionated jeremiad, I’ll leave you with a barf bag link: http://www.bclocalnews.com/bc_north/northernsentinel/opinion/70241612.html I have no idea why this site went to great pains not to link to http://www.airsicknessbags.com . Maybe they didn’t want to contract cyber-cooties or have Google downgrade their site for linking to questionable content.

Remember that this is always available at my blog: http://stevesmildlyinformativestuff.blogspot.com/

When did ADD become such a great quality?

I’ve always believed that the inability to focus on a single task such as say, driving, performing your job or talking with your spouse would be a characteristic that you’d want to correct (except for talking with your spouse). Not so! People these days revel in their inability to concentrate. Flitting from one focus to another, their ADD has become a point of pride. To hear some people tell it, you’d think the disorder was a badge of honor attained through years of study and practice.

Industry supports and encourages this. Twitter thrives on the supposition that people can optimally handle information in 140 character bursts. And it is the rare employer who would even consider hiring someone who asserts, “Although I excel at singular, analytic tasks that require focused concentration, I don’t multitask well”.

It’s just another one of those things that make me shake my head and realize how old, out-of-touch and marginalized I’ve become. I suppose the only way I’ll ever be able to cope with this phenomenon and use it to my advantage is to short Ritalin stock.

In another vein, I was recently interviewed as some sort of career expert on Dream List Radio for Teens, despite not having any teens (or career) myself. In the interview, I explain to teenagers various ways to prepare for career opportunities in being a wilderness guide. I did my best to somehow make it sound much more interesting and lucrative than the debilitating career suicide it actually is: http://www.dreamlistmedia.com/Outdoors/42.aspx

15 year old Brad Jones, (son of Roger Jones, the 1st place winner in the 2009 North Cascades National Park Stud competition) recently was awarded the rank of Eagle Scout. His Eagle project required 400 hours of volunteer service time. That’s more time than most people spend on their personal hygiene every year. (Check out the study in the Journal of Public Health, March 2008). Congratulations Brad!

If you’re tired of being summarily ignored by society, well, I suppose you could get a tattoo. But if that inexplicably doesn’t get you the avalanche of attention you so desperately want and so richly deserve, consider contacting Darlan Erlandson. She’s a publicist who specializes in concerts, shows, theatrical events, books, films, production companies and most any venue. Contact her now at fame@acd.net .

On Oct 1st, the tinny crackle of my voice permeated the airwaves of St. Louis on KTRS 550-AM. Thus, an audience that was as incredibly massive as AM radio could muster, experienced all the barf bag joy and happiness they scarcely knew could exist within themselves.

As if in lockstep, Nicehobbies.org listed sickbag collecting on their celebrated hobbies list: http://nicehobbies.org/funny-hobbies-list

Even Fatpacking has received some blog coverage: http://www.joannee-joannee.com/2009/09/fatpacking.html . Sure it’s negative, but hell, it’s press!

If you’ve ever dreamed of moving to Montana and raising up a crop of dental floss spending every day guiding people through the mountains of Big Sky Country or hiking the Bob you might consider purchasing a turnkey outfitting business from the father of a colleague of mine, Jodie Hooker’s dad. The business is called Bob Marshall Outfitters. http://www.BobMarshallOutfitter.com

Oh, and in the remote event that you actually checked, there was no Personal Hygiene study in the March 2009 Journal of Public Health. However I was indeed on AM radio in St. Louis.

Need Twitter Help!

I am attempting a cheesy marketing stunt that doesn’t involve a six-year old child and need your help. I am going to give away the free Camelbak pictured here: http://www.fatpacking.com/images/Camelbak.jpg. The person that wins will be the first one whose twitter name appears in 100 tweets and re-tweets along with a link to the Fatpacking website.


So for example if your Twitter name is @JoeShlabotnick, and you tweet:


RT: 1st w/100 retweets wins a new Camelbak, details http://tinyurl.com/XXXX Check out Fatpacking, http://www.fatpacking.com @JoeShlabotnick


Then I could do a search on both Fatpacking and @JoeShlabotnick for 100 occurrences and give away the item. Now @LotsOfFollowers, who has a bigger social network, might (hopefully) decide that they want the Camelbak and retweet as


RT: 1st w/100 retweets wins a new Camelbak, details http://tinyurl.com/XXXX Check out Fatpacking, http://www.fatpacking.com @LotsOfFollowers


That’s 126 characters. The tinyurl of the web page with my explanation of the stunt will probably be longer when I generate it and the Twitter ID might be much longer too. And to top it off, the Tweet is pretty confusing.


First question: how do I explain this all in 140 characters? What should my tweet say?
Second question: I only have tens of Twitter followers. How do I disseminate this beyond my newsletter?


I’m doing this so that a link to Fatpacking proliferates throughout Twitter. Twitterers not only have a chance at the Camelbak, their Twitter name also proliferates.


That’s all for now. I’ll resume actual Mildly Informative activity soon. I’m considering sending shorter, more frequent posts.


Remember that all mild information is mirrored on the blog: http://stevesmildlyinformativestuff.blogspot.com/

Am I on the Barf Bag Gravy Train?

Collectibles Corner TV recently interviewed me about the Air Sickness Bag Museum (http://www.airsicknessbags.com/ for those few who may not know). If you can endure the nails-on-chalkboard sound of my voice in order to hear the nails-on-chalkboard sound of my opinions, the interview can be found here: http://www.collectiblescornertv.com/35-air-sickness-bags-an-old-bottle-and-turtle-junkables-nao-porcelain-and-the-forum/. In the remote event that you aren’t interested in minute details about say, Iron Mechanical Turtle Banks, you can start the video at about 4 minutes in. Then, after watching the clip, you under 30s should Google the term “Chalkboard”.


Now if the rich, juicy goodness of that interview has whet your appetite for a figurative sickbag dessert, check out: http://www.killerstartups.com/Site-Reviews/airsicknessbags-com-air-sickness-bag-museum-online. Aside to lawyers: Is it worth trademarking the improbable phrase “Barf Bag Gravy Train”?



Fitpacking is in the news! Here’s one of the best articles ever written about it. Sure, it’s all lies, but that’s what keeps it from being boring: http://www.walkaboutmag.com/34footpaths.html . For those who prefer a visual representation of a Fitpacking trip, some pictures of last week’s Fall Foliage Trip can be found here: http://www.facebook.com/Stevebo?v=feed&story_fbid=171596010927#/album.php?aid=112005&id=17187844623 .



And I’ve been fortunate enough to garner even more media coverage that has absolutely no chance of helping me pay off any of my bills. The Modesto Bee published an article illustrating how not to interview for a job. You can experience the wacky hilarity here: http://www.modbee.com/columnists/workwise/story/862754.html



Just a thought. Instead of shouting “You lie!”, Senator Joe Wilson could have made his point far more eloquently by just throwing his shoes.



Finally, it’s time for some social commentary that I spent a lot of time thinking about but will ultimately affect no one in any tangible way.



The Wonderland Dog Racing track near Boston closed permanently last week. It’s good news for the dogs, but like anything else these days, for some it’s an opportunity to spout the rage that they love almost as much as life itself.



Now I can’t for the life of me figure out what’s so amazing about dog and horse racing. Some people claim they love the beauty and grace of majestic animals racing. And that may be true, but nobody ever assembles dogs or horses together just for the sheer joy of watching them run. There’s always some kind of wagering involved.



Much like the stock market, the NCAA tournament, and dog fighting, if no monetary payoff was involved nobody would care about these things in the least. If people get some auto-erotic thrill by guessing outcomes over which they have no control, good for them. But why involve animals?



Every year, scores of elite Track & Field gazelles graduate from college and are forced to take idiotic dead-end jobs just to make ends meet. Why not put an end to dog and horse racing permanently and bet on racing athletes instead?



It’s far more entertaining. Pro wrestling fakes the competition yet it thrives because of their athletes’ personalities and back stories. The same could be true of human racing. It would save all the jobs that dog and horse racing fans use as a red-herring to rationalize their cruelty, but it would also create new jobs for the athletes and be more humane to the animals to boot.



And while some might claim that betting on humans would cause corruption, then someone please explain why jockeys somehow can’t be corrupted. Just make sure to say it angrily and forcefully.



If you have something worth saying to the elite and powerful audience of superhumans who read this newsletter, send it on and I guarantee I’ll find some way to trivialize your point for a cheap laugh.



Remember the blog can be found here: http://stevesmildlyinformativestuff.blogspot.com/

Please Stop Delivering My Mail Already

I am not a government efficiency wiener. In fact I’m about the only person you’ll ever meet who thinks taxes are too low (yes, really, but I’ll address that another time).

For now, I think it’s high time the Post Office stopped delivering US Mail so frequently. They should only deliver it a maximum of 3 times per week, say Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Now this might reflexively offend your sensibilities. After all, no living American has ever been without their daily snail mail fix. But if you take a moment to let the feeling pass, you might see some merit in the idea.

The bulk of the mail you now receive is well, bulk mail. These days, few if any important documents arrive in the mail at all. If it’s important or time-sensitive, you receive it electronically or if a physical item is required, via Fedex.

Oh sure, we all reminisce about how great it was to get that perfumed letter from a distant love (all 3 times) or how exotic it was to have a pen pal in 1974. But even then, time was not of the essence, just as now you don’t wait by the mailbox in desperate anticipation of your Val-Pak.

Now you may bristle at the notion that your paycheck will be delayed an extra day, but I’ve got news for you. If you receive your paycheck in the mail, you’re already receiving it at least a day later than you ought to. And isn’t it time you started paying (and receiving) your bills online?

I have no idea how substantial the cost savings of 50% less frequent mail delivery would be or what else we could fund with the vast sums of money saved, but one thing is for certain. I am not going to do any of the research necessary to find out.

In other news, Gayton Gomez has finished her first novel. I can’t tell you anything about it but she did admit there were space aliens in it (tangentially anyway) so you know it has to be good. If wry wit and tortured sensibilities borne of a lifetime full of pain appeal to you, you should read this book. Next newsletter, I’ll find out what the title is.

For those of you who really don’t have a feel for what Fitpacking destinations are like and actually care (an intersection of about 2 people) check out this slideshow produced by megastud Roger Jones taken on the North Cascades National Park Trip this August. Unlike the other lame links contained in this newsletter, this one is really worth clicking: http://secure.smilebox.com/ecom/openTheBox?sendevent=4d5445774d4467314f4456384d6a45344e5467304d44553d0d0a&sb=1

Speaking of Fitpacking, it recently merited a mention in the InsureMonkey Blog: http://www.insuremonkey.com/community/2009/08/04/planning-a-vacation-consider-a-fit-trip/. Sure, InsureMonkey may sound minor, but I’m hoping it’s the stepping stone to similar, but even greater media leviathans such as the WarrantyLemur Blog or the UnderwritingDungBeetle Blog.

I was recently featured in a PBS article about health insurance. They only asked me factual stuff and not my opinion. That’s too bad because I would have come out strongly in favor of the death panels that the wacky far right came up with to scare people. But if you want to read the article: http://www.pbs.org/newshour/updates/health/july-dec09/exchange_07-23.html


If you’re a big fan of SMU football, well I guess you’re either an 18 year old frat boy or you’re an adult who really should be spending more time with your family that you’re so desperately trying to avoid. However if you insist on following the team, booming baritone Chris Martin will be doing play-by-play on TWC Metro Sports (whatever that might be) on the following dates: 10/10, 10/17 (all at 7pm), 11/7, 11/14, and 11/28 (2pm).


And finally, I would not be fulfilling my personal mission of harassing you with barf bags if I didn’t send you a link to some recent media coverage, this time from South Africa: http://www.dispatch.co.za/article.aspx?id=341324. My next goal is to obtain media coverage in Lesotho.

Remember that this newsletter is posted to the Steve’s Mildly Informative Stuff Blog: http://stevesmildlyinformativestuff.blogspot.com/.