Fashionista!

As Fitpacking lurches and sputters inexorably into off-season obscurity (as opposed to high-season obscurity, I guess) I have just accepted a software contracting position that runs through the end of this year. While I'm supposedly being brought on board for my technical expertise, some might be surprised to learn that my fashion sense may have sealed the deal, as the client is Talbot's (Tall Butt's?) So prepare yourself. If all goes according to my insidiously evil plan, my flair for fashion will soon permeate the racks at J. Jill. I call it "Clueless Couture".

Given my recent experience seeking a contract, the apparently starved-for-content Albany Times-Union solicited my opinion about the assertion that the resume is dead. You can read my unbelievably profound and borderline prescient views about this on their site: http://blogs.timesunion.com/classconflict/?p=711

I just returned from Fitpacking's annual 53-mile Fall Foliage trip which traversed the entire (almost) Connecticut section of the Appalachian Trail. The weather was unbelievable, the views amazing, and the hiking sublime. You cannot verify this however, since no photos have as yet made their way back to me. Regarding upcoming Fitpacking trips however, I'm most excited about escaping winter at the end of January in Cumberland Island National Seashore, GA. http://www.fitpacking.com/2009/CI.cfm

Speaking of Fitpacking, I somehow buffaloed a website geared towards would-be entrepreneurs into thinking that their readership might be interested in my advice about running an emerging business. Bwah ha ha ha, suckers! http://www.gaebler.com/Interview-with-Fatpacking-Founder-Steve-Silberberg.htm

I just had the pleasure of meeting with Adam Reid of Back2Health Spinal Fitness in Hanover, MA. Back2Health can provide a whole array of health options, but specializes in back and neck problems. If you have spinal issues and live near the South Shore of Boston, check out http://www.b2hspinalfitness.com/ . Or you can e-mail Adam directly at: adamreidcei@gmail.com . I'm certain he'll respond quickly, unlike messages sent to me, which immediately plummet into a vortex of procrastination.

Nantasket beach comes alive with awesome waves and pounding surf every Fall. So the other day, when Vickie Baumwald and I were walking her border collie (and my rental dog) Toby on the beach, we spied a lobster trap tumbling around in the incoming tide. I waded into the somewhat frigid water, heaved the trap ashore, opened it up, and we went to town, releasing dozens of crabs, clams, mussels, and the one small lobster that had entered the trap. Yes, crustaceans now consider us heroes (as do the seagulls). Anyway, to celebrate our bold and empowering act of animal liberation, we went out to lunch, passed up the clam chowder, and had some veal instead.

Amazing voice talent Chris Martin can make anyone seem evil. Certainly, barely scratching the surface of most people would expose some evil, but many of us run an ongoing, manipulative, all-encompassing marketing campaign to attempt hide any trace of our banality and therefore humanity, thereby completely obviating any chance of real emotional intimacy with others. The point is, listen to Chris' political voice ads here: http://www.thecampbellagency.com/broadcastfilm/voiceover/men-political.html

This newsletter just wouldn't be very Mildly Informative if I didn't beat you down with recent media coverage of the Air Sickness Bag Museum:

Endless Vacation Magazine:

http://www.fatpacking.com/resume/images/EndlessVacation200809.jpg

Blogs:

http://3rdacts.com/sidebars/airsickness_bag_museum.php

http://coquinadaily.blogspot.com/2008/10/saturday-october-4-2008.html

http://www.been-seen.com/article.cfm?id=10848

Susan Laves just began her Freshman Year at Wellesley College and is already far behind on homework. At least we can now accurately refer to her as, "Susan Laves, Student". Congratulations!

Hey readers, here are some of my pet peeves!

"Do the math" irritates me to no end. It's weasel shorthand for "Do the math, idiot" or more bluntly, "Figure it out, idiot" or even "It's obvious, stupid". There's never any math involved and for some reason, people never take offense when they're called morons in such a cutesy way.

The phrase "People Smarter Than Me" is generally used by smug, sanctimonious jerks trying to somehow deflect deservedly negative judgment of their palpable ignorance using some humble, positive, aw shucks spin doctoring. Y'know what? Be honest and say, "I'm a stupid idiot".

I also hate the word "think" as in Think: Literary Device. What this generally indicates is that the writer has made a poor analogy or a lousy point and feels they must get you to ignore their failed attempt at establishing their idea by tagging their text with what they really meant to say all along. If you make your point, you don't need to tell me to think.

Time for me to end this missive by reminding you that no matter how much money our society has collectively lost recently and no matter how fast we're hurtling towards a protracted depression – Thanks GWB! You're the best president ever! – and no matter how much you love or hate war, we are still officially at war. Our people are still returning home wounded and can really use our support. Here is one way of doing so: http://www.purpledogtag.com .

Remember, you can always view this newsletter as a blog and get the RSS feed here: http://stevesmildlyinformativestuff.blogspot.com/